is that why people on the hill always think im an intern?

recently my office installed cable in our offices. those of you who know me know i dont have cable at home. i choose not to have cable not as any sort of statement, but rather because if i had it, i would never sleep choosing instead to watch infomercials until 5 a.m. eating take out and drinking red bull to stay awake long enough for bare essentials to go on sale at qvc. in other words, i would weight 900 lbs and when i died, i wouldnt fit out my door, rather someone would have to knock out a wall and use a crane to lift me out.

it therefore goes without saying that putting cable in my office was a bad decision and my productivity has gone from 20% to zero.

admittedly, headquarters put cable in our offices so we could watch cnn and cspan (which by the way, is like watching the security camera at the men's warehouse store). this was pointed out to me when i was caught watching "what not to wear" on the style network (in my defense, it was during recess!).

i have since been tuned into cspan all day every day (except at 4pm when i watch the daily show and the colbert report, natch) leading me to ask: is there some sort of time warp in the house of representatives that slows down time whereby a "minute" in the house is equal to five minutes everywhere else on the planet? and if so, do congressmen age more slowly? i demand an investigation!