snowflake's good deed backfires

dear homeless man:

when someone buys you an egg mcmuffin breakfast, the appropriate response is "thank you" or, at least a grunt of acknowledgement. "bitch, there aint no jelly in here" doesnt really convey your appreciation of a free breakfast. next time you can treat, and i'll show you how it works.

however, if youre going to continue to push your luck, may i suggest these more pleasing rebuttals?

a) "bitch, where's my beer?" because while im not a beer drinker myself, i can appreciate how nicely it round out a meal of salt and grease, or

b) "bitch, where's my hashbrown?" because next to the french fry, it is mcdonald's most perfect food, and, honestly, i was remiss in not buying you one. and for that im sincerely sorry. i couldn't, however, give less of a shit about your jelly.

sorry.

xoxo
van nasty