van nasty

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

to paraphrase george costanza: "he just dislikes me so much... it's irresistable."

i started my day by locking myself out of my apartment at 6 a.m. i think that pretty much set the tone for the rest of the day.

this morning was my first of three (yes, you read that right, three!) sessions with my trainer. i think its completely realistic to expect to be down to a size four by the end of those sessions, dont you?

naturally, my trainer is gorgeous (in a short kind of way - seriously? when did the keebler elves become my type?), and we seemed to have the same feeling about working together: it will be as exciting as eating your weight in chocolate. which is to say, im thrilled. him? not so much. he offered to set me up with someone else no less than eight times; it was like being on an awkward first date where the guy says youre not his type, but he knows this guy in the mail room who lives with him mom and is really into dungeons and dragons who might like you. and he specifically said "i dont have much experience working with people whose primary goal is to loose weight" -- only he didnt say it that articulately. more like spicoli. i half expected him to tell me he was too busy "learning about cuba, and having some food" to train me. although to his credit, he said if i wanted to stick with him, he would be willing to work with me which i think is pretty generous considering ive already paid him!

anyway - today, we mostly talked about my fitness goals, and how i became a fat ass. so, you know, fun light-hearted topics! we didnt begin working out, so when i come back from my vacay in the northwest, i will have three full length sessions to look forward to with a man who tolerates my existence the same way he tolerates his girlfriend storing her tampons in his bathroom: with a barely concealed look of disgust.

on a side note, people react very strangely to a fat girl in gym clothes. mind you, i dont wear spandex, nor do i expose passerbys to my exposed flesh, so, i dont think its the muffin-top effect where there is more of me than there is clothing to contain it. rather, walking to the gym, random early morning exercisers are abnormally friendly, and a woman whose clothing choices indicate that she is either fashion challenged, or a nurse, gave me a big thumbs up. apparently i look so fragile and vulnerable in my hot pink t-shirt, and long black yoga pants that strangers feel the need to be supportive. however, once im in the gym, its a whole other story. other people shy away from me like im sweating out pure crisco.

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van nasty

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