van nasty

Saturday, August 25, 2007

things that annoy me about you

3) mystic tan: not only did it turn me into a human creamsicle - orange in some places and maggoty white in others - but i am also apparently allergic to it, and am itchy in some very private and uncomfortable places.

2) mail: a resident just came down to find out if the mail had come in and became irritated that i wasnt at the desk and didnt respond fast enough. im sorry that im human and i have to pee; maybe next time you can walk the extra foot further and check. your. mail. yourself!

1) people i work with: much the same way i dont want to go to the movies and narrate to you what happens (who is that? ... wait, what just happened?! ... oh! is that his wife?!?), i dont need you to tell me how my book ends. yes, i do know its a good book; ive already read 333 pages of it. you however have only read one, and just because it was the final page doesnt mean i want you to recap me on what happens.



Blogger HomeImprovementNinja said...

1) I'm pretty sure you're bad result was because you didn't exfoliate first (I dated a girl who used to get that done, and the first time she tried it, her skin looked like what you just described).

2) Why does the person sitting next to me on the metro always look over to see what I'm reading. Get your own fucking book!

2:37 PM  
Anonymous suicide_blond said...

im allergic to it as well.. no kidding..thought i was the only looked great...but i had to swallow a zillion benadryl to keep from coming unglued from the itchynesss..

4:13 PM  

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van nasty

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Location: van nasty, washington, dc

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